A Beautiful Ghost

Two nights ago, I went home to our house in Bulacan. The house looks so different now. It doesn't feel the same way anymore. Even the smell. It's not how it used to. But I still missed it. I left a lot of important things there and I just realized how suddenly I transferred to Quezon City. The clothes, the bags, the shoes, everything. I suddenly forgot about them. Like I was kidnapped or something then went home one day and see all the stuffs I left. Most of them are either worn out or broken. Sayang talaga! But I really had fun reading my past diaries! Haha.. I can't stop laughing at the things I wrote.. funny me!

Anyway, I was up until past 4 am. But I was already on my bed by 2. I was haunted again. I have this dream where it keeps playing back over and over in my mind. Like it's stuck or something. A dream about me and that someone I was talking about. He went away seven months ago. But we haven't seen each other since then. So I kept thinking how are we gonna look like when we meet for the first time again. What would I say? What will I be wearing? I keep dreaming of it.

But unexpectedly, my dream came true afternoon yesterday. I really thought I saw a ghost. I can't believe it. My heart pounded like crazy and I stood there frozen.

The guy whom I fell in love with for the first time was standing in the same room where I am and I miss him so much.

In my dream, I ran towards him and hugged him. But at that moment, I wasn't able to do that. I barely even smiled at him. I just went blank.

But I realized, he was too. We were aware of each other's presence. It was really awkward. We were sort of evading each other. But he did say hi to me. I wanted to talk to him some more but I guess it was best that we won't. I mean, a part of me wants to go back to him but the other half is telling me not to.

This time, I want my head to rule. I really messed up the last time I let my heart decide.

Tomorrow.. is not just a new day, but a whole new year. And I guess, I hafta be stronger now. I need to grow more. But I'm really glad I got to see him again. And I hope that the next time we see each other, things between us will get better. Well not really that kind of 'better', better.. but an okay relationship. I dunno.. um.. New year, new start diba? :)

So I made a list of the things that happened to me this 2008:

- Last summer, I had my OJT in Makati. I worked in a small events company where I met tons of people. Some were good, some were okay, some were mean and ugly. But most importanly, I met someone who meant a lot to me. I experienced lots of new things that really changed my life. My practicum taught me more than I thought I would.

With my Twinnie and Tito Roly Halagao


James' serious face

- I started to model again. My brother and I became more active this time. I also went back to acting and had a small role in a telenovela in GMA 7 (Ako si Kim Sam Soon). Though I'm starting to think I'm being typecasted as either maarteng mayaman or kikay na boba.

- I made lots of good friends in show business. They really are beautiful people, inside and out.

KSS family at Princess' despedida

playing with Jen's webcam @ the KSS set

KSS Cast party :)

- I also tried hosting. My first hosting gig was a carshow and I was really nervous. I thought I'm gonna co-host it with someone from NU 107, but the guy left early for the Eraserheads Reunion concert. So.. there, I made a mess. But they said I did okay. Haha!

- I had my first real kiss.. (and almost my first boyfriend).

- my THESIS.. which is killing me. I never thought it would be this tight. It stresses me just by even saying it.

Well overall, I could say that 2008 was the weirdest year I ever had so far. But I'm happy how it all went. Right now, I'm just wishing a great year for 2009. So stay safe people..

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

My Delicious Holiday

Yeah..it's yummy 'coz I want it to be. Haha! I was so depressed a few days ago and I wanted to change that somehow before Christmas. So I'm trying to make me happier by getting my mind off from work and school stuffs. So instead I was thinking.. 'Santa's coming and he's gonna fill my Christmas sock with all the presents I mentioned in my wishlist.' But then I remembered, I never made an actual Christmas wishlist. So there's no way I'm gonna get that shiny silver volvo ever. Except if Santa can read minds.Tsk tsk.. poor Misha.

Anyway, my Christmas wasn't that bad at all. I just tried to relax the whole day 'cause I sort of deprived myself from doing that while I was doing my thesis. Also if you noticed, I gave my blog a makeover. It already has three columns. Yay! But I'm not yet done with it. And um.. the player's not yet working. I dunno what's wrong with it. So.. whatever.

I really loved the dress I wore yesterday at mass. I so love animal printed stuffs eh. Haha!

My mom picked the earrings for me. :)

I was still online 'til past midnight just greeting everyone in YM. My webcam sucks though. I was waiting for someone to greet me but I guess that won't happen now. After all the things we did to each other. *sigh* But I still prayed that everything will be okay.

Btw, I find it really annoying when guys act really freaky and say nonsense things to me. I mean, they really thought they could get away with anything online. Grr.. ang kapal talaga ng iba. Sobrang manyak pa!! I can't help but be rude to them. They're so unrealistic. Another WHATEVER. Haha!

Enjoy the holidays everyone!

Merry Christmas

What's left of my November and the days after

Here I go again, another summary post. I became super busy these past few weeks so as much as I wanted to update this blog, I can't. But I swore to myself I'll fix everything up before Christmas. I was contemplating whether to include all my previous experiences which I failed to share or just get on to what is currently happenning to me. But it would be a shame not to mention it at least here diba? So thinking of all the stuff I need to do to keep this up to date is extremlely tiresome and therefore, I lose my gusto to blog sometimes. But I really love blogging, that's why I push myself to do this. Anyway, here it goes...

November 6 (Thursday)

I finally agreed to pose for the Carfinder magazine cover. My agent was making kulit because he really wanted me to do the photoshoot. He booked me for the gig millions of time but lucky for him I ran out of excuses already. Haha! I arrived at the studio in Libis Quezon City around 11am. And it was a wrap around 5pm.

November 7 (Friday)

My mom was going hysterical. She woke me up telling that my brother is in the Security Headquarters of Gateway mall with two snatchers who attempted to steal my digital camera. My brother and I were together the night before so I slid my camera inside his bag and forgot to unpack it before he left for school. On his way there, a guy approached him and told him that he saw someone took something from his bag's pocket. Together they followed the two clueless suspects and succesfully caught them. But then when they searched the suspects, my camera was nowhere to be found. It turned out that one of them threw the camera in the bush near the huge Christmas Tree just outside the mall so they won't be found guilty. If you could only imagine what the guards did to the culprits to make them admit where they left it. So when my mom and I arrived, the snatchers were already weak from the beating. Mahn.. when I saw their wounds, I suddenly felt nauseaus. And when the guards started to gang up on them again, I really jumped out of the room. It was just too much for me.

The bad guys.. tsk tsk!

It's a riot people.. a riot!

My brother giving his statement

November 11 (Tuesday)

I watched Quantum of Solace with my good friend Ahleks Fusilero. We went karoaoke after and made funny faces at the Purikura Booth in Timezone.

Another lovely starbucks moment :)

My favorite strawberry waffles

Going karaoke in Timezone Greenbelt

November 14 (Friday)

This time I spent my day with my closest girlfriend Jessica. We watched High School Musical 3 and did some shopping for her boyfriend's nephew.

UFO catchin'.. LOL

With Lexie, goofin' around at the purikura booth

November 18 (Tuesday)

Thesis mode: went to interview Marilou Diaz Abaya in her Film School in Antipolo. I saw my friend Badji Mortiz who was studying film there. It was really nice to see him again. Though it made me miss Gokada Go! even more :(

Nananakot?! haha

November 20 - 23 (Thursday to Sunday)

Modeled for Speedlab in Manila Autosalon 2008 at SMX. We wore sexy police uniform with matching badge and baton. Haha!! It was really tiring but I love doing carshows compared to other events. Check out the rest of the photos in my multiply site.

lunch time with Concon :p

Scorchin' the scene

No uglies allowed. LOL

A candid shot

November 30 (Sunday)

Had dinner with my folks at Napoli Restaurant in Timog! I so love their pasta.. yum!

Grinning like a retard.. haha

December 18 (Thursday)

Met lots of new people at Lalola set. Just a cameo role for Marky's wake episode.

L-R: Boris, Anya, Misha and Zoey

White ladies + 4 musketeers

I wanna kill my laptop!

This is so not happening. Now I'm really going crazy! My dad switched our laptop's OS to Linux or something. Ugh.. I don't even know what this is. All I know is that this really sucks.. and its pulling on my last nerve!! Grr.. I hate it! And now I'm using Mozilla Firefox.. so when I checked on my blog, its all over the place. Grabe.. its a total mess. I dunno if I'm the only one viewing this like what I'm seeing it but I'm hoping this is just a special case...'coz if not, I'm gonna get really frustrated. And to make it worse, all the softwares I installed were *poof* - gone. Of course, the OS changed.. so we have to reinstall everything again. Even the YM's gone.. no more anything. Just some crappy programs I don't even dare to touch. So the way I see it, I'm betting I won't be able to upload pics anytime soon. Jologs nuh?

Anyway, I'd just like to thank everyone who welcomed me back to blogging. I really appreciate it guys. I've been disconnected to this world for quite some time. And I thought most of you forgot about me already. So I was really surprised to see you all happy for my return. Thank you.

Oh.. and about the axe commercial. It's no big deal actually. Like I said, there were like 30 of us running over Ramon so I'm pretty sure you won't even recognize me (and I hope you don't.. 'coz I looked like a retard). But thanks anyway. It was really hilarious and I'm happy I got to be part of it.

Today I went to the dentist. The school dentist asked me to swear to fix my teeth before I come back to school for second semester. So there.. done deal. But it was really bad. The feeling, the taste, my achin' neck.. ugh..

I also had my nails done. :) It looks really funny. Too bad I can't share it with you guys. *sigh*

Lastly, I just want everyone to know... I started dating again! Haha.. It's a big deal for me 'coz I don't go out that much. Especially after being so broken and all. So I'm really happy for myself. I'm not really sure where this is heading, but I just realized I went out with a really cool guy. A perfect gentleman. Were supposed to watch “Twilight” together. So yeah.. I'm thrilled.

Very exhausting week

Mahn.. I was totally drained over the past week. It didn't even leave me time to update this blog and I sincerely regret it. Now I'm left with tons of things to do and I guess today's the right time to do it. 'Coz something might suddenly come up and I won't have time again to do this.

Let's start off with:
October 20 - 21 (Monday & Tuesday)

Ku Manahan asked me if I could model for an event in Manila Hotel. His good friend Denise de Chavez badly needed models for their booth on such a short notice. Luckily I din't have anything better to do so I agreed.

(L-R) Misha, Ms. Denise, Joyce :)

Freyssinet girl

October 22 (Wednesday)

Okay, thesis time again. We met up around 11am in Jollibee Vito Cruz to check the progress we made for tour thesis. Gawd, we badly need help. Our research hasn't taken shape yet.. and I'm starting to worry about the consequences. Our defense is up on December 9. I'm waiting for a miracle to happen.

By the way, I am so excited to watch Twilight the movie. But I was also curious about the book so I decided to read it first before watching it. I'm so darn in love now with Edward Cullen! *blushes*

Hope I'll finish reading this before Nov. 21!

October 23 - 24 (Thursday & Friday)

I caught a really bad flu. I was terribly sick for two days. My body was really sore and I could barely get up from bed. I was praying that I'll feel better the day after because I already said 'yes' to my agent about the Axe gig. So I constantly watched the clock so I won't miss my medicine. I was so ill that I'd gag everytime I cough. My body was trembling and I lost my appetite. Thank God it became a little bearable by morning.

October 25 (Saturday)

First day shoot for the New Axe commercial. We wore a really short school girl outfit with plunging neckline. It was really funny because we were all conscious about our skirt. Our panties were really peeking everytime we move. But there were like 30 of us, so we kinda gave up on it. Thinking.. "The hell! they're all probably numb now from seeing a freakin' number of undies since this morning." And yeah.. "damn right were cute.. now choose your thong."

Lovin' the schoolgirl outfit!

1. Feelin' my new uniform. 2. With my idol, Ramon Bautista!

Pretty schoolgirls eh? With Chinggay.

I was pretty excited to post our pictures in my multiply account but my fever striked again late in the afternoon. So I rested early so I'll be able to work still the next day.

October 26 (Sunday)

I arrived last in "Renaissance Hotel" because I felt really bad that morning. I was probably stressed during the first day because of the running and yelling we did for the shoot. My meds din't help either. I already took 2 Biogesics before leaving the house, but I still felt like puking.

I thought I was gonna faint when I arrived at the location. Everyone thought I was plain "mataray" looking so no one really bothered to ask how I was. They probably thought I was just not in the mood to mingle that's why I wasn't talking. What they din't know was that I was actually extremely sick. I was fuming due to my fever. Gawd, I don't wanna remember the feeling.

Everybody loves chocolates!

Not feeling very well here.. Ang diin ng kapit ah! haha..

October 29 ( Wednesday)

I attended our long- awaited batch reunion party. Five years.. yes, it was that long ago since we last saw and spoke to each other. Most of them didn't change that much since high school. Although most of the boyish- typed ones bloomed into ladies. Hehe! I am really glad. They finally outgrew that awkward stage.. just like I did. If only you could see us back then - chopped off hair and chunky backpacks - we were... um.. confused. Whether to look cute or tough. Haha! But I guess we could all blame our parents for enrolling us in an exclusive school for girls. Or at least in my case, its their fault.

Tired and hungry.. with my Ototo

Oh and yeah.. if you notice, I dyed my hair. But its not the color I wanted so I hafta redo it sometime this year.

It was all worth it

I was really overwhelmed when our professor called out our movie as the best short narrative for our AVP class. "Pupul" she said, and I my eyes got blurry. I wanted to cry.. thinking, "God, it was all worth it". Everything we did really paid off. Not just because we won, but watching it myself made me proud.

Our movie was entitled "Pupul", a kapampangan word that means "Ani" or harvest. It was basically about a single mother who wouldn't let his longing son to know his father. Anyway, I'll just post the trailer here once I get a copy of it. I'll also upload the pictures in my multiply account so you can view the behind-the-scene shots. Just check out for the link, I'll post it here as well.

Pupul Unofficial Movie Poster

Busy-bee: Me with my Director Nicolette Henson

I'm really glad how everything turned out. At least despite of the difficulties we experienced while filming this, were ending the semester as winners. This is one of the biggest challenge I've ever faced in my entire college life, but I swear... I won't trade this experience for anything.

Here it Goes

Prologue

Test mic.. 1, 2, 3.. Okay it's working. (Clears throat) Um.. so this is it huh? It's been like what? 7 months since I last blogged. ‘Coz some low life bitch deleted all my accounts. My two friendster accounts, two yahoo mails, my multiply site, and yeah... my blog. I really missed this a lot. I wanted to create a new blog long before, but I never had the chance to fix it. But I realized that the clock is ticking, and a lot of things already happened in my life. How I wish I had a blog to document everything.

Screw the Haters
I know sooner or later my haters will find this again. And I’m not exactly sure if this is a good idea. But the hell with them, I’m gonna continue blogging anyway. It’s not like my life will stop just because some fugly bitch wants to screw my life. I pity them actually. They really want my attention. Like I said in my previous blog, I don’t give a damn if you don’t like what I’m doing. I’m happy with my life, and I’m not messing with someone else’s life just to be what I am right now. If you’ve got that much plenty of time to watch over what I’m doing, then maybe you could also find a way to fix your own life. It’s too pathetic. And believe me, I don’t hold grudges on anyone. I know who you people are, and I know how stupidly sick you are for masking yourselves as my friends. Oh well... I never imagined I have to repeat myself again. It’s too tiring to talk about this shit over and over. Get a life.

Number 1
This is one of the hardest part of rebirth. Should I adopt what I used to do or reinvent and start over? I wasted countless hours before trying to design and customize my previous blog. And it’s really sad to think its all down the drain. That’s why it took me this long to redo everything, because I dunno where to start. And as you can see.. the whole page is a mess. But hopefully I’ll have the time to do all these stuffs this summer. Just give me some time ok?

WYSIWYG
As is you can see.. this is my blog, MISHA’s blog. Meaning.. all you’ll ever see in this page is me, me, me. I din’t choose you to be here and read all of these, you did. So don’t complain if you’re getting too much of me. If you’ve got a problem, just click the ‘x’ button at the corner of your screen and kill yourself. Haha! Just kidding… but seriously, this is my own life and I’m just sharing it to the people who care to know about me. So don’t go commenting on my posts saying I’m too egoistic. If you don’t wanna know, then you wouldn’t wanna see this at the first place.

Let's Begin
So yeah… it’s official. Just come visit this page once in a while. And don’t forget to leave a few words… it won’t harm y’know.